What Worked and What Didn't in 2024
Sharing my reflections + insights from the year
What worked and what didn’t in my 2024, from my book launch to family milestones to meals and nails to faith and church!
During “The Hush”, the time between Christmas and New Year’s, I take time to reflect on my year, what I learned, and what intentions I want to set for the next year.
In my last post, I shared practices, questions, and a Mind-Body exercise to help you with your own reflection.
I received a few encouraging emails and comments from readers that appreciated the short paragraph in which I shared my own answers to the reflection questions. So, today’s post is my attempt at sharing my longer reflection process, inspired by the “What’s Working and What’s Not” lists of writers like Ashlee Gadd and Emily P. Freeman.
Please leave me a comment or reply to share your reactions or questions to my lists, or share your own “what worked and what didn’t” for the year!
What Worked
1. Avoiding ruminating on my book reviews.
As I shared in this post on book reviews, historically I have taken critiques and evaluations very hard, resulting in late night ruminations and existential crises. And while there certainly have been a few comments on social media or parts of a few book reviews that became content for venting to my husband or Voxer rants to my VA, for the most part, I have been able to keep a balanced focused during my book launch and not let the criticism affect me too much. Staying true to my values and my purpose for writing has helped, as well as the work I’ve done in my own therapy to tolerate and accept that not everyone will agree with me, and I will be ok.
2. Family milestones
This year, my daughter graduated from pre-school and started Kindergarten. My almost three-year-old son potty trained, speaks in full sentences, and showed improved behavior at childcare. And as of this weekend, is now pacifier-free at night! My sister got married and we were all in the wedding, traveling multiple times for wedding events and then her baby shower at the end of the year. So it’s been a sweet year of family milestones and enjoying my growing kids.
4. Getting EMDR trained.
2024 was the year I invested the time (one full week of trainings plus 10 additional consultation hours) and money (thanks to the extra income I earn from coaching) into getting fully EMDR trained. It’s opened so much more possibilities in my therapy practice, including the ability to offer Therapy Intensives for purity culture recovery. And I have already seen how effective and life-changing it can be for my clients, as it was for me in 2021 when I received EMDR myself.
5. Celebrating my book launch.
One life lesson I have learned is to celebrate myself and my accomplishments instead of expecting others to do it for me. I knew I wanted to throw a celebratory launch party and was so grateful to have three local friends who wanted to help me plan and organize it. As an adult, there aren’t many more times to throw a party and celebrate yourself, and I’m glad I didn’t let this occasion pass me by.
I share about my party and the final stages of publishing my book in this post:
6. Down time.
It’s important to me to protect down time in our family’s calendar. We enjoyed unstructured Sunday afternoons on our back porch or taking walks. About once a week (like today!), I have time to read, journal, and write alone in my bed in the morning before I start my workday. My kids and I look forward to “Mommy-kid” days on Fridays, most of which had to be put on pause this fall due to my book launch and my daughter starting school. I enjoyed some day dates and dinner dates with my husband too.
7. My therapist moms’ group.
A highlight of my month, I get together for coffee with a group of friends who are all therapists and moms. This has helped me avoid the isolation of being in private practice, and introduced or deepened friendships with wonderful, caring women.
8. Trying new clothes and nails.
A silly one, but until Fall 2023, I hadn’t bought new clothes for myself since having kids! And the styles have changed too fast for this skinny jeans-wearing Millennial to keep up. So I follow a few style influencers and especially love Putting Me Together’s blog and seasonal wardrobe guides to help me update my clothing and mix pieces together.
And for nails, I became OBSESSED with Polish Pops, a gel nail wrap you apply at home that lasts 2+ weeks! After years of getting damaging and expensive gel and dip manicures, I now exclusively use Polish Pops and absolutely love their fun seasonal designs! Use code DRCAMDEN for 15% off if you’d like to give them a try!
9. Practicing embodiment.
Every time someone asks me about skills for purity culture recovery, I always mention embodiment with the caveat that this is still a work in progress for me. And this year I practiced embodiment through continuing yoga, mindfulness, rest, and listening to my body when making big decisions like deciding to narrate my audiobook and picking my publisher and book cover.
Leading a book club with my launch team was by far the highlight of the launch process, a way to make my work embodied that I hope to continue in our quarterly live meetings for paid Substack subscribers in 2025.
Here is the plan for the Live Meetings for 2025:
February: Workshop and AMA (ask me anything) on singleness, dating, and relationships from an egalitarian perspective
May: Book club of Sheila Gregoire’s new release, The Marriage You Want
August: Workshop and discussion on navigating church/faith practices when you’re deconstructing
November: Workshop and discussion on boundaries with family and the holidays
You can upgrade to a paid subscription for just $5 per month or $50 for the year and get access to exclusive content like this post and the quarterly live meetings with me. I kept the cost low, but if you want to join and cannot afford it, just email me and I’ll add you! You can also gift a subscription to a friend, or subscribe as a Founding Member to fund a scholarship to someone else who asks for it.