Relationship Status with Church: It's Complicated
When you have left your church but you don't want to leave the Church
How do you rebuild a relationship with church when you don’t want to leave the Church, but you have left your church?
In “Why We Left Our Church”, I shared my experience of church and the process up to leaving. The deconstruction of my relationship with the Evangelical Church, if you will.
In this newsletter, I’ll share my relationship with church now (spoiler: it’s complicated). What does reconstruction of your faith look like when you still want to love church?
Because I am sharing my personal story again today, this full post is available only to those who have invested in this community by becoming a paid subscriber. You’re welcome to join us for $5 per month or $50 per year.
The Both/And of Grief
In
’s poignant essay, “I used to belong there. I don’t belong there anymore,” she talks about the grief of leaving spaces we formerly belonged to, specifically for “people who feel that they didn’t so much ‘leave’ their church as were left by their church.”1It’s both the longing and the relief, the grief of what we lost and the satisfaction of knowing our own truth again… We don’t really want to belong there but we miss the feeling of belonging, just the same.
—Sarah Bessey
This is the both/and of a complicated relationship with church: we can feel sad and relieved. Confused and confident. Grieving and hopeful.